Homeowner wants to remove memorial for dead teen from property – and internet rallies round them

A new homeowner moved to a quaint country home, hoping for a new start. They had gone through trauma before, and this was the perfect opportunity to put that behind them.

There was just one problem with the home — a memorial to a slain teenager sits at the edge of the property, a constant reminder of a tragedy that happened a few years prior when a group of teenagers barrelled down the road, drunk. They wrapped their car around a tree on the property, and one of them died.

The family established a memorial on the property, and every year since that fateful day a half-decade ago, they’ve been coming back to lay flowers and tributes to the fallen teen.

READ MORE: Girl, 8, killed after being sucked into hotel pool pipe pictured as mum pays tribute

But to the new owner, the memorial is depressing and not something they said they want to see every time they come home or enter their property. They want it gone. But would they be seen as a villain for removing such a precious thing?

The memorial in question is a four-foot cross accompanied by a little memorial with information and pictures of the deceased teen. It’s not exactly an inconspicuous part of the property. It is, however, very much a part of the new homeowner’s land, so it’s ultimately their prerogative what happens to it.

Taking to an anonymous internet thread on Reddit to vent their frustrations and ask for advice, the homeowner made a post in the infamous “Am I The A**h**e?” subreddit asking whether they would be the a**h**e if they removed the memorial.

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The post reads: “I recently purchased a home on a country road. Five years ago some drunk local teenagers wrapped their car around a tree on the property and one died. Their family created a roadside memorial with a 4-foot cross and wooden sign. People come a few times a year and place flowers, notes, etc.”

They continued: “The memorial is on my property in front of the tree they hit, about 10 feet from the road. I don’t want to see this memorial every day. It’s depressing and reminds me that a tragedy happened here, which I don’t need. I’m trying to get over some stuff. I want this home to be a fresh clean start. But I’m also sensitive to the kid’s family and friends’ feelings. WIBTA [would I be the a**h**e] if I asked the family to take down the memorial?”

Redditors were quick to express their opinions, with most being sympathetic to the homeowner’s plight but also seeing the side of the mourning family. The most upvoted comment, which got over 15,000 likes, said that the homeowner was “NTA,” or not the a**h**e.

The Redditor wrote: “Plant a hedge around it between it and your house so you don’t have to look at it. NTA. It would mess with my head too. You’ll feel terrible if you pull it down though.”

Another wrote: “NAH, have a conversation with the family. Maybe offer to make a little flowerbed at the foot of the tree where these folks can come leave flowers, but that isn’t a glaring 4ft cross that turns your private home into a public graveyard. I do think it’s weird, especially as time goes on, to keep focusing on the spot the kid died, instead of celebrating a place that was significant to him while he was alive.”

Others agreed, including those who had lost kids of their own in similar situations. They talked about how they dealt with their own grief, but then also about how they began to move on. Many said they planted flowers on their own properties or that they found other ways to remember the dead.

Ultimately what happens will be up to the homeowner, who only asked Reddit for opinions on Monday. Whether or not drama ensues remains to be seen.